My Ambition

Lately I've been thinking about what I am going to do when I graduate. I will be graduating in one year's time (hopefully).. and I still have absolutely no idea what I am going to do! No doubt I will get a BEng (Mech) degree.. but from what I experienced during my attachment, I am not so sure if I want to spend the rest of my life being held reponsible for something I designed, or bear an eternal guilt when something goes wrong. Being an engineer is not easy, especially with all the responsibility that comes with it.

I haven't really thought about what else I could do. I used to want to do some business stuff, but looking at how bad the market is, and how all the NBS graduates flock to join some insurance company as a financial advisor, I have some serious doubts about this industry. People are right in saying that, no matter what you major in, you can always join the business sector if you are willing to start from scratch. I guess I am eligible, but so is everyone else.

I did think about what kind of job I want. I want the kind of job that has flexible working hours, where I can call my friends up for coffee whenever I want to. Colleagues whom you can always chat with, friendly, and non-competitive, a good boss who dotes on me, gives me lots of work to do, many projects to handle, but trust me enough not to keep tabs on me. A job where I get to go on courses FREE! The salary has to be attractive too, about 4K per month would be sufficient. Well, I know this is more like building castles in the air, but surely I can dream!

Sigh.. I really need to sort out everything before I graduate, so I won't have too much time to feel sorry for myself over some silly reason. Anyone has any idea?

The Workplace

It has been awhile since I last posted on my blog, there have been some issues regarding using the office internet, so I guess it is better to lie low for awhile. Then again, life in the workplace is so boring and tiring that anyone with not enough to do would definitely keep their browser open for 8 hours a day.

I have been working for more than four months now, and I still find that this place suck. Yesterday, someone tried to make me feel more positively about this place. I mean, I have never been a pessimistic person, and things hardly ever gets me down, even if they do, they won't stay too long. However, I realised that I've been down in the dumps since I came here. It is like, I have no purpose in working here. The reason why I am coming here every morning is just to get a good report for my attachment. I don't enjoy coming to work, nor do I enjoy meeting my colleagues. All I look forward to is lunch with my friends and dinner with my boyfriend.

I began to think about the reason why I am behaving this way. Do I have a problem? The answer came to me just now, over an incident with the most unpleasant person in the world. There is this guy in my workplace, who always walks around, sighing away, acting like as if he is really busy and stressed out, but in actual fact, the company does not have much projects right now. He is really good at acting out the role of the model employee, but his competence is highly in doubt.

Well, this guy just proved his incompetence again by dumping a major part of his workload on my desk. Perhaps he is just plain lazy. I don't know, although I am obliged to help him, I am extremely reluctant. It is not that I am busy to the extent that I have no time to help him, no. I am moderately busy, just have to rush my report that is due in two week's time, and some work that I am almost done with. However, I do not wish to help him because I do not at all believe that he needs my help.

I am always ready to help someone who knows what he is doing, but is too busy to do it himself. I would be all smiles when helping that person. Afterall, if I am stuck, he would be obliged to help me. However, when you are doing nothing but pretending to be busy, and gives the impression that you do not know what you are doing, or you are too lazy to do your work yourself, then I am most unwilling to help you. The worst thing is, he uses the boss to force me to do his work! And the way he speaks to me.. Hello! I am doing you a favor! So don't you think you should use some manners?

When you encounter people like this, no matter how positive you may be, your spirits would definitely be dampened. No matter how excited I was when I joined this company, all that passion and determination to do a good job, evil will prevail and triumph. In the end, I would end up like how I am feeling now... pissed off, angry, bored and hating my job together with the people that comes with it.